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It’s Caturday, and I’m working again. I’m just a workaholic. It’s amazing that I find any time at all for grooming and cat naps. And hunting geckos. And snacking. I’ve been practicing my barstool acrobatics, but I can’t really approach Cirque … Continue reading
I have a new hobby, and I’m so excited! A few days ago our human brought home a new bar stool. I didn’t think it was anything special at first – we already had some identical stools. But I quickly realized that this stool was different. Better. This new stool is perfect for feline acrobatics, and I’ve been spending all of my waking hours practicing. It’s really good for the core. Don’t you think I’m looking a little slimmer already? Any minute now I’ll be svelte enough for my human to stop the diet cat food… And if things don’t work out with the dairy cow people, Cirque du Soleil might be an option with a little more practice!
is that ice in my whiskers???
How cold is too cold for the Hawaiian cat, you ask? Tonight may get below 50°… I know, you’re thinking that I’m just a wuss. But when was the last time you set your thermostat at 50°???
It’s been almost two weeks since I mailed my letter to the milk folks, but I’m not concerned. I’ve stepped-up my Bovinity studies a bit, so I can be prepared for the part when I receive their call. As you can see in this photo, I’m getting really good at portraying the true essence of cow…
Do you think I should get my ear pierced, too?
Businesscat, or used car salescat???
Since Caturday was unproductive, I spent Superbowl Sunday working hard. I’m more of a curling kind of cat than a football kind of cat, so I wasn’t heartbroken. Especially since I timed a grooming break to coincide with Madonna’s half time show. I love Madonna…
I’ve finished sprucing up my resumé, but I’m concerned about my professional objectives. Is “fame, fortune, and celebrity” too honest, or should I say something like, “I’d like to end world hunger by eradicating feral chickens”?
My human redeemed herself for sabotaging my working Caturday by giving me this spiffy bow tie. Unfortunately, it seems to emphasize my lack of neck…
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Even though it’s Caturday, I decided to spend the day working on my CV (resumé, for my American fans) and putting together a media kit, as I’ve had a sense of impending stardom. Unfortunately, my human has stubbornly tried to … Continue reading
Today is a huge day for Maru Can Kiss My Furry… This is my 100th post, and any minute now my 8000th visitor will be wandering through. For days I’ve been trying to decide the best way to commemorate the occasion. I thought about showing a slideshow of my 100 favorite photos, but my attention span isn’t long enough. And neither is yours, I’m sure. Then I considered listing my top 100 search terms, but I was afraid that listing multiple variations of phrases like “furry humiliation” and “furry kissing” might attract the wrong crowd. So then I thought maybe I should write a tribute to my idol, Donald Trump, or to Maru-san because he inspired me to follow my career dreams. Nah…
I finally decided that I wanted to write a post about my favorite moment in blogging. There have been lots of great moments since I started Maru Can Kiss My Furry…, but there’s one that stands out above the rest. Those of you who read my wish list for Santa Claws might remember that I asked Santa to bring my very favorite kitten, little You-Sheng, aka Sprocket, from the Miao Chronicles a little red beret. I could hardly contain my excitement when Littlemiao posted fantastic photos of Sprocket learning to wear his new little red beret in the post How to Wear a Beret, Lesson 1. The Miaos made my Christmas dream come true!
In appreciation for my favorite bloggy moment, I wanted to post a fabulous photo of myself in a jaunty chapeau. I had to improvise a little…
I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but I have a hobby. I dabble in the culinary arts. Most of my role in the kitchen is supervisory, since I’m lacking thumbs. My human was nice enough to built me a shelf where I can sit while I critique her work, which saves me from accidental staining and singeing. We have a nice partnership in the kitchen… Or had a nice partnership, that is…
I’m not entirely sure how this happened. I do know that my human obviously skimped and didn’t get the drywall anchors rated for plus-sized cats.
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Have I mentioned lately that my human isn’t the sharpest crayon in the box? Meet Moa, or the feral Hawaiian chicken. We have tons of them, and they’re everywhere. When one appeared on my doorstep this morning, apparently my human … Continue reading
Dear California Milk Advisory Board,
My name is Pedro the Cat, and I have some amazing ideas that build on your “Happy Cow” ad campaign. But first, let me introduce myself. I am a fabulous cow-spotted and career-oriented feline. I am currently owner and editor of the popular blog “Maru Can Kiss My Furry…” and am working on my first manuscript, which is destined for the Best Seller list. I’m also a student of Bovinity, and recently I was honored to be named one of the Top Ten Cows of 2011 by the blog “Every Day I See A Cow.”
I know that the “Happy Cow” ads are popular, but I would like to propose an improvement that would draw a much larger demographic’s interest, in addition to being more economical. I would like to be your next Happy Cow. You can see from the enclosed comp card that I am quite stunning while wearing my prosthetic udder, and I certainly have the look of a Happy Cow. Can you imagine the reaction of cow and cat fans across the nation as they see Pedro the Cat as the California Milk Advisory Board’s official postercowkitty?
In addition to gaining the attention of cat lovers everywhere, working with a feline would also be much more cost effective and would certainly involve less feces than working with common, untrained livestock. Additionally, cats are famous for their love of dairy products (although milk does make me a bit flatulent). Perhaps you could hone in on an important market in California Dairy products as cat treats.
I urge you to contact me at your earliest convenience to discuss this new ad campaign and contractual issues. I am on the verge of fame, so any hesitation on your part might mean that the Got Milk? people have already Got Pedro.
Sincerely yours,
Pedro T. Cat
Future California Milk Advisory Board Spokescat
I’ve never felt like my profile page caught the true essence of Pedro the Cat, so I decided to revamp the whole thing. You should check it out when you have time!
I know that Kitty makes it sound like I’m a big bully cat that’s always picking on her. She complains that I groom her too much (as if there could ever be too much grooming!) and try to play with her all the time. Well, tonight I have photographic evidence documenting just how generous and kind I am to her.
Remember that fantastic box I celebrated winter solstice in? Kitty started squatting in the box days ago, and I’m letting her stay there. I know that the solstice box is a great haven, and Kitty deserves a nice place to snuggle up and wait out the bad weather we’ve been having. See – I’m not such a bad guy!
enjoying winter solstice in my cozy box
Kitty living in MY solstice box
It’s a little strange – I’m not really sure if she’s come out of the box since it started getting stormy on Monday. But my human checks on her a few times a day to make sure she’s still breathing… Kitty gets really cranky every time our human lifts that lid!
My best blogging buddy cat, Sammy of One Spoiled Cat, awarded me with a wonderful award. THE Wonderful Blog Award, in fact. I’m very excited about this one, since I really am wonderful. Thanks, Sammy!
Naturally, there are some rules for the awardees. They are:
1. You must be a follower of my blog. Done.
2. You must link the award back to my blog. Gotcha.
3. You must pass the award on to three other blogs. Okee-Dokee.
Here are my three nominees and the reasons I chose them (drumroll and fanfare, please!):
The Miao Chronicles - Every day Littlemiao posts beautiful photos of her gaggle of cats. They are all gorgeous cats, but the little tripod kitten she rescued last summer is so charming and lovely and wonderful that I just melt every time I see him. And he’s going to be gigantic, like me!
Lemonysqueezes - Lemony is a volunteer at Helen O. Krause Animal Foundation’s shelter for cats, and she posts stories and photos from the time she spends with the special needs cats there. The stories of her cats just make my heart ache. Billy Bob is almost as handsome as I, and CATarina would love a home where the humans spelled her name correctly. Little Holly yearns for a quiet home, and Sox will be looking for an energetic family to provide lots of playtime soon. And there are so many more, slightly less than perfect cats that just want a home. Lemony is wonderful for the time and love she gives these cats. And the cats are wonderful just because they are.
Catself - Bugs is the coolest, toughest housecat on the block. He’s adapting to life off the streets, but he’s still a bit rough around the edges. And he & I share a hobby – door climbing. He’ll perch on any old door, but I prefer the bifold type… Bugs’ Bean is a wise woman and wonderful storyteller with an interesting point of view. And that makes for a wonderful blog.
Thanks again, Sammy! You’re the best!
Last week one of my loyal and brilliant fans suggested that I send my udderly fantastic cow costume photos to the Got Milk? people. At first I thought it was a silly idea, but the more I think about it, the more I like it. Can you imagine me impersonating a cow in a milk ad? I might need to have some more professional photos taken of me wearing the udder first, though. Those sad looking horns beside me are a little disturbing.
The excitement of the holidays is over and it’s time to get back to business as usual, but I’m having a hard time getting motivated to do much work at all. I’m really missing the tree and decorations, special treats, and all those boxes. Even Kitty was nice for the holidays – she even played a few games of hide & seek with me. (I’ll never understand how she ALWAYS wins because I’m a very skilled hider!)
As a transition back to serious writing and brand building, I thought I would reminisce about my favorite box of the season. Some of you might recognize it – previously it wore striped wrapping paper. That was a fantastic box, and my human recycled it yesterday. I may have loved it just a bit too much…
Whew! The holidays were so busy that the last few weeks were just a blur. I decided to take a few days off to refocus before I start pursuing my career with renewed enthusiasm…
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Happy New Year! New Year’s Day is a chance for humans to get a fresh start with a clean slate and a horrible hangover. Everycat understands the importance of cleanliness, so we can appreciate the “clean slate” portion of the holiday at least. So … Continue reading
For most of the world it’s already New Year’s Day. But here in Hawaii, we have a few hours left to finish proclaiming our New Year’s resolutions and to freak out over the neighbors’ fireworks and karaoke.
I’ve finally come to a decision about my own resolution. After much consideration, I’ve decided that most of the resolutions I was contemplating are unrealistic. To avoid unnecessary stress, I’m vetoing all possible resolutions except one – I will be contacting Maru-san’s human to suggest he see a dermatologist for that mole.
