Tag Archives: maru

Jul 8 2012

pedro needs some tech support

Hola and Aloha, mi amigos! (Sorry – not sure how to make that strange little upside down exclamation point thingy.)

Today I was online, looking for inspiration. I found myself at Maru’s blog again, and saw something quite stunning that made me realize what my blog is missing. A camera. A great camera that will take fantastic action shots like this, without too many buttons to confuse my poor, technically challenged human.  With a simple interface.  And one she won’t notice on her credit card statement…  Any suggestions???

Et tu, Brute.  (That’s Spanish, right?)

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Jul 2 2012

things are looking up for pedro the cat!

Exciting things are happening around here!  My human is back to “normal” and has started working on my portfolio again.  Kitty has become remarkably supportive and our friendship is strengthening.  And today something really exciting happened that has helped to rebuild my confidence and solidify my career goals.  I can’t believe it myself, but today I checked my Word Ads statement and I am excited to announce that PEDRO THE CAT HAS AN INCOME.  Yep, I’m bringing home the bacon.  At this point we’re talking about a slice of bacon, or maybe two.  But I’m so excited to think that someday I will be able to afford to bring home a whole pound of bacon.  Pedro the Cat is on the way to fame and fortune!  Look out Maru, here I come…

Jan 15 2012

my letter to maru

I’ve been working on my New Year’s resolution, which you will recall is a letter to Maru urging him to see a doctor about that troublesome mole on his nose.   I wish my trusty advisor Mojo Cat were here, but he’s on saCATical.  But here’s what I have so far.  Is it too harsh?

Dear Maru-san,
I am a business cat with some serious concerns about your welfare and interests.  I attempted to learn Japanese last week in order to communicate with you more easily, but found the studies were distracting me from my grooming.  So I’m hopeful that we speak the same dialect of feline.
Before getting to the point, I’d like to introduce myself.  I am Pedro the Cat, the American cow-spotted blogging cat and soon-to-be superstar that was recently named one of the Top 10 Cows of 2011.  You were actually the inspiration of my blog, which is entitled Maru Can Kiss My Furry…  I hope that you won’t be offended by the name of my blog, as it’s just a nod to my superiority.  The premise of my blog is that if an average, foldless and Scottish-liltless Scottish Fold cat can be a celebrity and published author, then a brilliant, business savvy, stunningly handsome, charismatic cat like myself can be an enormous (in fame, not girth) international superstar.  My blog chronicles my climb to superstarcatdom. 
I’ve studied your blog and career extensively, and I have some serious concerns about your treatment and welfare.  I feel as though a cat with your fame and income should have more.  More toys, more human servants, more sashimi.  And more artistic control - I’ve noticed lately that you seem to be annoyed by those cardboard boxes your human forces you to wear around the house. And less tooth brushing.
Additionally, and the main purpose of this letter, I’m very concerned about that mole on your nose.  I hope that you will urge your human to take you to have it carefully checked to rule out skin cancer (ganshu and kokushukushu from my week of Japanese language studies).  Cancers of the skin are the 2nd most common cancers in cats, so I hope that you will make sure that’s done immediately, as you’d be much less marketable without a nose.  That would also make hunting geckos much more difficult.  You do have geckos, don’t you?
Sincerely yours,
Pedro T. Cat

Nov 25 2011

i wish every day was black friday!!!

I couldn’t believe it when my human woke me up at 3:00 am. I’m on my winter schedule and I normally start ordering breakfast and waking everyone up at 4:30 am, so I was tired and cranky as I washed my face and prepared for the day. I knew she planned on getting an early start, but this was just ridiculous!

I was having a tough morning, so imagine my delight when my human returned home a couple of hours later with a fantastic present. And it was for ME!!!

I love my new box.  Look at how roomy it is!  It’s perfect for laying in wait for  the perfect moment to pounce on an unsuspecting gazelle.  Or Kitty.

Black Friday is the best holiday ever!

sttrrreettch
Nov 24 2011

a time for cats to give thanks and get turkey in return

It’s Thanksgiving.  It’s time for American cats to show their appreciation for the humans that normally receive our mockery and scorn, and then receive a large meal complete with bits of stuffing and morsels of turkey.  Since this is also the time that Santa is making his list of naughty and nice felines, I intend to do this gratitude thing right.  My wish list is extensive this year, so I’m highly motivated…

I know there are lots of kitties and people less fortunate than I am.  I am thankful that I have a warm home, healthy food (even though it’s diet), fresh water, and clean litter boxes.

I am grateful to have been adopted by a human who grooms me, cuddles with me, and lets me lean on her when I feel insecure.  I am thankful that she is concerned about my health enough to encourage fun exercise (remember the kukui nut?) and watch my caloric intake.  I do wish she would stop brushing my teeth, although I appreciate the concept of dental hygiene.

I am thankful for the ambition and means to begin pursuit of my lofty career goals.  I am grateful to have been able to start on that path with this blog.  I am thankful that I am a beautiful cat with amazing whiskers, gorgeous ear tufts, fancy red Soft Claws, and a fun cow-spotted coat so that I can attract visitors.   And I’m very thankful that I am intelligent and witty enough to keep their interest and turn them into adoring fans.

I’m especially grateful for the community of bloggers that I’ve found and their support.  They are sometimes comical, sometimes surly, and sometimes deep and meaningful, but they are always THERE.  I had no idea that as I was starting to build my fan base with this blog, I would also be building a family.

I would also like to show my appreciation for Kitty.  She pretends to hate me, but I know she really loves me.  I appreciate her sharp wit and sarcastic (sarCATsic) humor.  I enjoy playing tag and hide-and-seek with her, and I enjoy giving her the long baths I know she loves.

I would also like to express my gratitude to the genius who invented Black Friday.  While my human is battling fellow shoppers for the best deals and enduring painfully long lines in the middle of the night, I appreciate that I will be able to shop for my deals online in the comfort of my couch.  And I am thankful that my human is big and mean enough to win any wrestling match over a new appliance or gadget.

In closing, I would like to say again that I am thankful that I am stunningly handsome and exceedingly charming. And I am very, very thankful for the little nibbles of turkey skin I’m expecting to receive. And maybe for a dot of whipped cream on my lovely nose.

Nov 15 2011

reviewed business plan = renewed confidence

Yesterday I was wandering through WordPress, and I found a post entitled “Blogger Scores Book Deal for ‘You Are Not So Smart’ “.  (I know I should be able to turn that title into the actual link, but I haven’t figured out how yet.  So use this instead:  http://wp.me/pf2B5-2i7 .  Give me a break, I’m a cat.  I’m also going to use the feline excuse for not knowing whether a blog title should be underlined or put in quotes.  I did both.  Go big or go home.)  In that post, there was a quote from David McRaney that confirmed that my entire business plan is sensible and realistic.

As a businesscat, I’ve wondered whether my strategy translates well into the human business world.  And as a new blogger, I’ve wondered whether my plan is progressing at an appropriate rate.  After reading the following paragraph, I knew that I am absolutely on the right track:

“This is an amazing and revolutionary time for writers,” David says. “The barriers to entry are so low, and the platforms like WordPress.com are so well made, anyone with a voice can start shouting and be heard. Instead of writing a book and hoping a publisher won’t throw it into the slush pile, writers can start a blog and build a fan base. They can prove to publishers there is a market for their work and their voice.”

I am firmy entrenched in Phase I of my business plan, which consists of building the brand and establishing a fan base.  In Phase II, I will be prepared to leap that low barrier to entry with manuscript in paw and followers following.  With or without a Dinky Pony or Drugged Poltergeist or whatever, I will be a successful businesscat and celebrity…  And now I just need to find another few thousand subscribers.  And take a little nap…

Oct 29 2011

amuse-bouche (not for the squeamish)

I know my human works hard and I can be a little demanding at times, so this morning I planned a little surprise to show my gratitude.  I knew it was her day off, so just before sunrise, I woke her up with a nice, long bath and hair grooming session.  Then I left her alone so she could enjoy the little breakfast treat I left on her pillow.  Forget Wheaties. Geckos should be the breakfast of champions!

Oct 13 2011

holy cow-spotted cat – part 2!!

On August 27, my post http://pedrothecat.com/2011/08/27/ showed my surprise at having had 500 visitors.  And now, 6ish weeks later, I’m preparing for my 2000th visitor.    Want to know what the big difference between this milestone and that one is?  I’m not surprised anymore!!!  I’m smart and sassy and fabulous, and I’m going to be famous!  Look out Maru, here I come!

Sep 23 2011

headshots for my portfolio

I’m eager to start working towards my career goals again, which is probably a sign that I’m starting to recover from my gecko snack… I’m still a little queasy, and when I feel bad I like to just sit on my human’s lap. (No petting; she’s just furniture.) Since we’re so close, it seemed like a good time to work on headshots for my portfolio.

Hmmm… I’m not looking like my normal, fabulous self here. Maybe I need another day off…

(My human says my ear hair reminds her of her pediatrician. He must have been very handsome.)

Aug 23 2011

subliminal smartass?

In order to make an impression in the competitive world of celebrity cats, I need my fans to see all of my talents and skills and charm. To accomplish that, I really need some great action shots and exciting photos. For the past week I’ve been planting subliminal messages in my human’s mind about the shots I need…

These are the photos I get? Is this her subconscious being a smartass???

scalp massage
Aug 17 2011

my first swag!

I’ve just received my first gift from adoring fans. They gave me this miraculous invention called a scalp massager. My scalp feels amazing. And so do my legs and my tummy and my furry bum. I feel so good that I almost didn’t mind when my human thought the massager would make a nice beret. Almost.

P.S. Thank you, fans. I celebrate my birthday in January (hint, hint).